Blogger · emotional · Love · relationships

Just because it’s different

I apologise again for my continued absence. I am finding it hard to write, or to sleep or to do anything really. (Typically –  I can eat though and drink wine, much to the detriment of my waistline  – I wish I used stress to get thin like any normal person)

I spend so much of everyday answering questions and talking about all the things that are going on at the moment it’s hard to also want to write them down. Everything here is kept forever ( unless you delete it obviously) and I love reading back my previous blog posts and remembering where I was at the time and marvelling about all the things that have changed since then. All the things I have learned and all the things I thought were such a big deal, but turned out to be really insignificant.

But a phrase I hear myself say all the time is this…..

“just because it is going to be different, doesn’t mean that it isn’t going to be better”

I think we are all guilty of viewing change as meaning that things are never going to be the same again, – ie. they are going to be worse. I certainly initially felt like my life was going to be over. All the lovely lifestyle perks I have enjoyed will be gone forever. That was it. I am 33 years old and the best bit of my life is already over

But we all know this isn’t the case!!

Because in fact, recently all the stuff and the social pressure to be something I’m not and all the expectation and everything really has been too much. I’ll have less stuff, yes. I will have a smaller home, yes. But I will get to chose who I share it all with. I will get to wake up everyday safe in the knowledge I can be me, just plain old me without any pretence and without any judgement ( I hope )

This middle bit truly sucks, but eventually it will be over and the future will be all mine to shape however I want.

I’ll continue to look for that long lasting love, the one I always write. It might already be here and that would be nice. But I will no longer fear being alone.

Because yeah it’s going to be a whole host of different.

But it is also going to be better.

15 thoughts on “Just because it’s different

  1. Downsizing your life actually seems like a great idea. It’s certainly a good thing to do when we’ve had enough of others’ expectations on us, the perpetual rat race, and so many other pressures society bears on us. Because we’ll be left with less clutter in our minds and in our external space. Does it not feel good to leave some of these things behind, or to have less stuff? Learning to be alone is fun too. It’s a level of love for oneself that a lot of people don’t have. A lot of people are uncomfortable being alone. I think you might like this new change. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree, change is always so hard to grapple with. Being risk averse, it is always simpler to assume that any changes will be for the worse (ie what is lost) rather than focusing on what can be gained. I hope the changes you have made can eventually bring you inner peace and a decluttered frame of mind.
    I enjoy your writings, and it must be hard finding capacity mentally for writing when life is too cluttered…

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  3. I agree with everything you said. Everyone mostly thinks change is going to be horrible, but that’s not always the truth. But living in a more simple life by downsizing is a great idea. I love your posts and I love how real you are. I think this change will be a great thing for you. 🙂

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  4. I’m only 23 but I feel like life is moving so fast and everything I wanted to achieve in love and my life just hasn’t happened. I feel like there’s a lot of pressure to have children before you’re 30… which nowadays people are waiting a little longer.
    I think it’s important to find the love you really want and if you need to wait for it for a little until you feel it’s right then so be it. Who cares about being alone for a while, the alternative is settling for someone who doesn’t give you what you want or someone who constantly leaves you feeling disappointed.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! And you are so so young! Don’t wish it all away! Travel and have adventures and let life happen – don’t force it! I was desperate to get married when I was your age and it didn’t work out! Wait until the right time! Learn from my mistakes and save yourself the faff!! Thanks so much for reading and commenting

      Liked by 1 person

  5. As they say, You do you! You are your harshest judge, maybe don’t be so harsh!
    well I’m 53 and life feels like it’s just getting started. yeah, my waistline is a bit larger than it should be, but I’m going to show everyone how to slim it.

    Liked by 1 person

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