Why is it, in relationships it’s like one extreme or another.
For example, you either have love. Or you don’t. You can try and hide from it, you can use different expression of hope and mutual adoration. But essentially, it’s either love or it’s not. Or is it? I have learned to know, this is a tricky one.
You have happiness together, or you don’t. I mean this on a two way level. because it is entirely possible for one of you to be full of happiness, and the other one of you to be just ‘meh’ or unhappy even. What happens when the balance of this is no longer equal – where are you both then? This can change over night, this is the most precarious one of all I think.
You either have trust or you don’t. Now, this is one I struggle with. Based on my own fear and insecurities. I want to trust, I know where trust is deserved or best placed ( I think) but there is always a niggle I struggle to knock down. Why wouldn’t they want more than me? someone who is prettier, more fun, more intelligent, just more? I need to work on this. because relationships rarely last the distance without this. And honest, why should they? We all deserve to be trusted and be able to install our faith and trust into the people that matter to us.
And you either have hope for the future together or you don’t. Though it is impossible to predict what will happen on any level going forwards. You are good to go, if you both share the same faith and hope that everything might work out. Because without hope, what is there really?
It seems to me, that in relationships there is a continual ‘or’ situation and there rarely seems like a ‘and’ situation. You can have one thing or the other, but almost never both.
Do you understand what I mean?