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Mourning something you’ve never had

Do you know what I mean when I say that? it could be anything, it could be imagining a job you didn’t get, a house you can’t afford. Or it could be a relationship with someone you cant have.

If you have spent the entire time absolutely knowing it will never happen, reminding yourself everyday, trying to be sensible. Promising that you wont fall in love because you know no good can come of it, you know the sentiment will never be returned. But you just can’t stop yourself. Are you still allowed to be sad even though you only have yourself to blame?

In a relationship, there can be just so many amazing things, but then there will be one thing. one issue, one sticking point. And all the great stuff disappears. It’s not valid. It was never real in the first place. How are you supposed to move on from that? If you feel the same, if nothing has changed for you.If the issues isn’t an issue to you, or if it is not something you could change, you want to. But you just can’t.  Does make a difference?

Should we be so sensible and calculated in our life choices? or should we act purely on how we feel and worry about the practicalities later? maybe this is what most of us do. Then the inevitable happens. Because that sticking point issue never goes away does it? try as we may to look past it, to mask it with one of the many many wonderful things, it will always be there.  Eventually everything is going to fall apart anyway, it may as well be now.

I suppose.


15 thoughts on “Mourning something you’ve never had

  1. WOW! I’ve been following and reading your posts lately. I just feel so worried for you. I mean we barely know each other. It seems like you are going through depression of a kind. Forgive me please if I’m wrong. All your posts lately are a bit on the negative and sad side. I feel like your doing something maybe putting yourself a bit down. I really have no idea. But, for sure I do know I’ve went through the WHY stage too! I used to ask same questions. I searched up contact so I could privately send this comment which would make it more comfy. But, couldn’t find it tho! I want to help if there’s something going on. Remember there’s a friend out there. Hope I didn’t pressure or stress you out. I may be confused 2.

    – The True Airg

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I have that same feeling. A part of me is always sad for no reason. Good that you’re fine. Just tell me anytime for help or to share your feelings! I totes understand the same thing which has happened recently to me!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I can definitely relate to mourning something you’ve never had…I think maybe that’s human nature & no one can be blamed for that. The heart wants what the heart wants…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Mourning something that we have never had is something, I think that we all at some point. Weather or not we realize that we are doing just that is another story, but I do think that we do it. However, we also pull out of it eventually and start to feel better or want something different as we grow. Things change and change is a good thing.

    Liked by 1 person

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