I have often wondered who it is that is actually in charge of our choices. I mean, for all intents and purposes i suppose we, as individuals are. But is that actually the case in terms of practical application?
It seems to me, that we have become an entire society of people who can’t actually make our own decisions without at least considering the impact on others, nine times out of ten we probably even go as far as to ask other people their opinion before we feel comfortable enough to make the choice ourselves. When did we loose the ability to make an individual choice? did we ever have it in the first place?
In relationships of course there is an element of consideration, of thought and of feeling, of, dare i say it, compromise but is this really enough to overturn what it is that we feel and want and require? I am sure that there are many many selfless individuals who will quite happily quash all of their own needs and make their choices based purely on the needs of others. But is this really a good thing in the longer term? Are people doing the same thing for us to counteract it? Can you maintain that level of self deprivation without waking up one day full of regret and resentment?
What does a sensible approach look like? how do you achieve the perfect medium, where you are making choices for you, without hurting others. In a scenario where everyone involved gets what they want and what they need at the time when they need and they want it.
Do some of us simply lack the confidence required to be in charge of our choices? it is just easier to let others dictate what we do and how we do it? Is sitting back and merely just letting life happen the answer to all of this ?